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Ronnie Rocket's avatar

Tonika, I think you know I was a special ed. mid school teacher for 17 years, so your story really resonated with me. You did a fabulous job of sharing with your readers what it was like. Of course, when I was teaching we hadn't arrived at the gender identity era in education. That would have pushed me over the edge. Aside from that, so many other incidents you mention were the same for me. Yes, the pledge being recited over the PA was one of them. Our principal who was from

Mississippi spoke with quite an accent, hard to keep a straight face when she recited the pledge in Spanish with that accent.

All things considered I wouldn't have missed any of that teaching experience for the world, despite all the frustrations. Not from the kids. I loved the kids, but with the insanity of the system. Never-the-less, we had such fun, putting on plays and skits, or like when I took them outside to blow off some steam and throw nerf balls around. They started aiming for my head. I let them. Why not? They were laughing themselves silly, so was I. They told me they would never forget that I let them do that. Sometimes you just had to go with your instincts, ya know?? I know you do.

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

This comment makes me smile, Ronnie! I can totally imagine you nerfing with the kids. Yes, I know you did special ed and I’m certain you know exactly how these things go. Nowadays, special we is mostly for behavioral issues, but those feel even more acute if you have one autistic kid in the group who can’t handle, say, loud noises. Oof. Dangerous combo.

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Ronnie Rocket's avatar

Thanks Tonika. So it just keeps getting worse. The only thing standing between the "devil and the deep blue sea" are teachers like you. Carry on. After all, you just live across the street. lol

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

😂 the convenience is definitely appealing.

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Ronnie Rocket's avatar

One last thought, I may have already told you girls, but one time I was so desperate to get order in the classroom, (I had a long term subbing assignment, before my special ed days) that I brought some holy water with me one day and sprinkled it all around the room before the kids came in. And it worked!! I did that every day until my assignment was over. "Try it, you'll like it." No shit! hahaha!

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

You did tell me! And you know what, I believe that anything you do with intention and clarity will plant a seed. The holy water acts as a tool in this regard. But it is you who actually does the manifesting. Thanks for sharing again. I hope you write about your experience as a SECA, Ronnie. Your experience should be shared with the world.

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Ronnie Rocket's avatar

Sorry to keep repeating myself. Thanks for the info on the holy water as a tool. I'll keep that in mind, and maybe sometime I will write about those days.

Many moons ago.

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Mary Poindexter McLaughlin's avatar

How in god's name did you get this published amidst your final weekend of performances?? I'm in awe. I'm also so moved by this piece, T. (And angry and aghast and bugged and dismayed... but that's going to come as no surprise to you. I've railed about the state of education so much I've bored myself.)

I didn't think I could love you more than I already did, but... I do. Bless you for your ginormous heart, and your commitment to those kids. xox

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

Eh, I wanted to put something out before school was out and there I was trying to cram it all on my last day during my lunch break. As it is, I forgot to include an anecdote that was a big observation early on. And I have a grammar mistake that I still haven’t gotten around to fixing… but I like very much that you appreciated the article. I know we see eye to eye on this. I’d like kids to learn through play and all this anxiety driven learning is anti productive. And for what? To temporarily remember material for a test and then promptly forget it for the rest of their lives? Ugh.

I love you right back and you warm my heart knowing you rail against this as much as I do. One day we’ll figure out how to change this Prussian system into something that works.

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Mary Poindexter McLaughlin's avatar

P.S. Michael Warden sent me this clip from way back when students were actually taught to IDENTIFY propaganda. I was floored... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8AGpILvdwDM&ab_channel=DavidHoffman

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

😮 🤯 why aren’t we studying this in school nowadays? I actually remember being taught subliminal messages in advertising in High school. But this would have been much much more useful!

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Mary Poindexter McLaughlin's avatar

Right?!!

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Mary Poindexter McLaughlin's avatar

P.P.S. One more thing. (Clearly I'm not able to restrain myself when it comes to the subject of education.) The organization called FAIR (Foundation Against Intolerance & Racism) has an incredible resource section for teachers, school administrators, and parents who are trying to navigate the current craziness: https://www.fairforall.org/advocacy-toolkit/

They've also created an entire curriculum called the American Experience Curriculum which is designed as an alternative to "Ethnic Studies." https://www.fairforall.org/american-experience-curriculum/

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

Will be combing through this, thanks!

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Barbara Sinclair's avatar

Ok, Tonika, I just full-on cried at the end when you told the little girl about how her hug made you feel welcome on your first day. 😭😭 You are such a dear heart, and witty as hell.

This was a thoroughly enjoyable read, albeit disconcerting regarding the state of our education system. I honestly can't think of anyone I would have loved as a teacher more than you. XOXO

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

Me thinks you would have been a fabulous teacher, Barbara! Kids read energy better than they can express themselves. You would have had them under a spell! Thank you for reading and commenting. :) thank you for making me feel so good.

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Barbara Sinclair's avatar

I had a brief gig substitute teaching an art class. And also summer camp (art), where I managed to slice a good chunk of my thumb off with an Xacto blade. :( Seems like ages ago...because it was! XOXO

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

Sacrificing chunks of flesh for art! Boy oh boy, so I know that game, says the lady who lost the tip of her middle finger to a moving piano accident for a theatre show.

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Barbara Sinclair's avatar

🤭 Compadres... 😂 XO

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The Word Herder's avatar

Geeeeezuz, I didn't realize how bad it IS.

This country is in deep doo doo AFTER we get rid of the Nasties.... They'd better keep some of us senior types alive for the coming ... what's a good word here, kids? GAP FILL? Life Gap Fill? Actual Education? School Not Dumbing Downs? oh help

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

I think loving in multi-generational households holds a key. A child should be exposed to the way different generations respond to issues and situations.

But yeah. Pretty bad out there. And I didn’t even include the worst of it because I forgot : my favourite kid in second grade, this boy who would draw on everything instead of doing his math or whatever - was a handful. Totally ungovernable. The teachers would lose their shit with this kid. But I thought he had so much spunk! Well, I didn’t sub for his classroom for 3 mins and when I finally did, he was completely different. He would do all his work, ace every work sheet and packet, always ask about his progress… when the mom came to pick him up, I inquired how were they able to get him to do that (that day he cried because he got one of the questions on the test wrong. Only one wrong answer!) and the mom was like, “oh, he is medicated now.” It broke my heart. They turned him entirely docile. Sure, he can do math. But he doesn’t draw anymore. He doesn’t joke. He doesn’t make silly songs about his classmates. His spark is gone.

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Barbara Sinclair's avatar

This makes me so sad, Tonika...

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

Quite. School encourages academic intelligence but doesn’t really promote artistic or emotional intelligence. I bet on the latter two to create a more humane society. And happier humans, actually.

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Tom Karnes's avatar

Wait wait, I know, televised sporting events are weapons of mass distraction, Exibit A: Castro had to ban beer at the stadiums because they were murdered each other in the stands, this was the blow by valve under a regime where there is no decent and you can never leave

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

Is that true? He banned booze?

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Michael Warden's avatar

Ya did a good job!!

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

Thank you. That video you shared with Mary was *chef’s kiss* btw. What happened to us?

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Michael Warden's avatar

Not sure how rhetorical that question is, but I'll offer a reply:

I'd say what happened to us is that evil has been infiltrating itself into everything for a long time and is now moving toward a peak, both to test us and to awaken the sleeping to the truths of where materialism, denial, or just plain apathy lead. That is, dire as it is, it is supposed be happening as part a spiritual evolutionary process. Pretty frickin' amazing to witness though, eh??!!

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

I absolutely agree!! I express this sentiment often. What a time to be alive!!

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Jenny Joy's avatar

Wow... not having kids myself, there's an entire world of stuff going on in the education system I know nothing about, this was really fascinating - thank you for taking the time to write about your experience!

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

My pleasure! Thanks for reading it. Is Canadian education just as indoctrinated?

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ExcessDeathsAU's avatar

BRAVO!!!!!!!

That poor little girl who said she has a tiny brain :(

Is it bad that as a Gen X/Y I understood 99% of the Gen Alpha slang? I should be learning Latin but instead my mind is full of this fr fr no cap.

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

😂 it’s nice to be able to understand the kids. Cant have them be mewing around you without understanding a lick of their lingo!

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Sane Francisco's avatar

I knew you had a job Tonika but I somehow missed that it was being a substitute teacher. Such great observations and such lucky kids to have you. That last bit with the little girl was so sweet but my favourite part was Buttheads! 🤣

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

😂 there’s a butthead center a block away from my house. I’ve always been interested in seeing what they got going on in there. Perhaps group meditation?

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Sane Francisco's avatar

Want to know something uncanny? I just walked past a Butthead Center as I read your comment!

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ExcessDeathsAU's avatar

I guffawed out loud when I read that. omg.

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Infanttyron3's avatar

Read the review of Box Top earlier today...eagerly awaiting the video.

I had to teach a regular, on-campus Sp.Ed. class for a three week summer school session as part of the credentialing process years ago. All my other work was in-home for kids who had a variety of issues that kept them from being on campus. Occasionally a but humdrum, but often remarkably stimulating and enlightening,

"That is not something that happens"? Middle and upper public school management people have such a precious and charming capability to avoid facing potential real-life problems when their institutional mythology doesn't allow for concrete solutions to things that not only might happen, but probably do happen. Oh well, whaddyagonnado? Not interested in trading places with them.

Minor proofreading suggestion...peddle >> pedal

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

Thank you, I will fix it. Been a little pressed for time and editing takes the short stick.

A great way to describe special Ed teaching, indeed, “occasionally humdrum, but occasionally remarkably stimulating and enlightening!” God, when their faces light up when they finally get it- it’s pure joy and so rewarding as an educator.

I’m doing what I can in regards to the video. I might just send it to you before it hits public viewing. Recording it this week and editing it when I’m in Mexico at the end of the month.

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Amy Sukwan's avatar

This was absolutely beautiful and the ending had me in tears. I home schooled my daughter during the Pandemic, very poorly I might add. I was too critical and impatient if she was not getting a concept as quickly as I thought she should, she would grow frustrated and it was a mess. I have total respect and admiration for teachers everywhere. My daughter has had many good ones over the years who looked at her with fresh eyes and encouraged and uplifted her.

Sometimes those kind words at the right moment will reverberate over the child's lifetime, even after we are dead and gone. God Bless You...

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

Thank you so much for sharing that, Amy! I completely resonate with the frustration. The twins didn’t always enjoy my homeschooling as I also got frustrated. They enjoyed it lots more when we started doing the autonomous learning. Of course that didn’t really help when they entered the school system. My little one is a lot more academically inclined and is sharp as a tack. But every child is different and I’m positive your daughter will take away from the experience a lot more than you could hope for. In the end, it’s that one-on-one attention that they received with the love that you bring to the table that would stick with her. I resonate with your experience pretty hard!

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37's avatar

Wow!! Emotional ending there.

You have gifts to be sure. Gifts that I don't have. LOL

Phenominal piece!!!

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

Thank you, 37. I’ve been thinking about the girl all day. Broke my heart to see her so upset over a stupid medal.

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37's avatar

I can imagine. Sadly, that's also largely the society we live in.

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Rob (c137)'s avatar

The people who are afraid of teachers today but think they were better in the past are absolutely insane.

Despite that, my mother told me to never let anyone have authority over me especially when I had to pee or poo.

One time my idiot teacher was upset for me asking to go to the bathroom 2x in an hour. I just told her, sometimes I gotta go more.

What kind of crazy person would be afraid of authority to not stand up for their needs?

A slave who thinks they are free, just like my teacher.

America is awesome in many ways but holy shit so many of the macho in this culture are such slaves to false idolatry.

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

This! Yes, thank you for elaborating. Enough bullshit out there in this world to also give our kids anxiety about going to the bathroom. So damn dumb.

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Daisy Moses Chief Crackpot's avatar

Such an' important toe-pick Tonika--yer harrowin' experience well noted, the connection ya made with the poor little girl "slighted" by the fool awards nuttiness, makin' 'er smile...wuz likely worth more than even the dineros they paid ya ta endure the indignitties of modern teachin'! In fact, that lesson, ta ignore the bully-monologue in her brain likely fed ta her by BOTH adults & kiddos.... wuz likely the best one she got all year. (Addin' from a pernt of reference.... my ma, all of 4'11 wuz a teacher in the Detroit Public Skool System fer many years... all black skool lil' white jooish laydee an' those kids TOWERED over her even by 4th grade--an' even then...'fore gun checks & metal scans at the door--there were knives & other torments. By the time I got ta NYSeized... the skools were WORSE than prison! Yup, havin' ta "ast" permission ta pee.... an' gitta hall pass...is too much! An' indeed they say NO WAY all the time.... No water allowed... pavlovian loud bells (trauma & trainin' all at once...), they open the cell block fer "recess" but since gyms (at least in NewYawk) were at a premium.... kids mostly got sat down ta watch a stoopid viddeyo fer their "break" so no wunder they were all bouncin' off walls. Only's gotten worse (phones, wokeness, etc) -- learnin' used ta be FUN-da-mental! Now it's just "mental".... Don't git me started 'bout that gender stuff.

We too homeskooled as ya know (one day I gotta write 'bout my daughter havin' a moment of curiousity 'bout skools--'till we did our homework!) but my younger one hadda pal that went from homeskoolin' ta public in 9th grade an' the first lesson back wuz they had ta find their "affinity groups" an' list levels of oppression (rankin' the kids, separatin' 'em) an' by that time my daughter's friend (since age 3!) who happens ta be black, had larned my kid wuz an "oppressor" an' so cooled a nearly decade long close friendship.... Ah, the lessons of eduMUCKcayshun.... right?

Will it git bettah? sure dunno....but when they say it couldn't git worse...I DO wunder!

Bravo on finishin' out the year!

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

Whoa! Great insights! I went to an all black high school and was the first place I get accepted for who I was (I changed a dozen schools my first two years of being in America) and I don’t remember any of the racist or woke shit (this is early 90s- how was it better then than now? What tf happened?

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Daisy Moses Chief Crackpot's avatar

oh mah, a DOZEN?! that's cwazy.... wull, that's a crash course in adaptin' fer sure!

....but yup, the woke / gender stuff sadly wuz used as a wedge to divide kids accordin' to their "affinity groups" & interSEX-shun-all-itty malarkey. Bein' in NYC everythang wuz originally color blind (nobuddy gave a hoot...soitenly in the homeskool whirled) until just 'bout the time of the plandemic---then weird stuff happened in an outta skools...Takin' sides (of COURSE the wokeists took sides against us antiVaxxers) an' of course sides were created arty-fish-ally by every dumb criteria on the planet (includin' a big anti-homeskoolin' movement that came outta HaHaHavard...

An' apart from in "da biz" (thee-ate-'er / film) where suddenly we aren't "diverse enuf" this grid of divisions affected the kids the worst! My younger one also got shade from former pals fer not using proper "gender-speak," not usin' the be-spoke proNOWns, oh an fer callin' a gay guy gay (b/c, as her scoldin' went, ONLY gay people who IDENTIFRY as gay kin say gay...) dumber & dumber stuff but the kids were sucked in--the ones on social mee-dia bullied the ones who were not so-in-duck-trinated

Yup, we lost a lotta pals we never imagined.... Havin' grown up alwayz in urban settin's Ill say that it depended on the neib.... middle class, no problemo--but I knew kids got their a-ses kicked hard in the tough schools or those that got ugly when they bussed in kids from the projects.... my ma had ta pull me outta public when it got real skerry-bad--one good friend's lil' brother got knifed (at age 6!) an' another friend (4th grade) got burned all over with cigarettes by the mean girls... the "fun" 70's!--an' yet we all had friends of all races 'n cultures 'n stuff....AN' we could joke 'bout ourselfs...kids today are sooooo sensitive...micro-aggressions an' easily offended... they would NOT have survived what I lived thru... (bullyin' got way worse but kids also got programmed ta claim victimhood.... back in my day kids punched each other in the nose or wrastled in the halls!)

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

Oh man… that’s some trauma shit you witnessed. Is that why our generation tends to shrug its shoulder and keep on keeping on? Perhaps we’ve seen the horrors up close and simply decided that shit ain’t for us.

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Daisy Moses Chief Crackpot's avatar

Mebbe so! I think survivin' tough times an' havin' ta fend fer ourselfs was different then--again, least for us urban kiddos.... no mollycoddlin'! I gotta few years on ya but I think all us pre-social-MeeDia humans had that advantage... no helicopter moms, no good-jobbers (yuk), no let's give everybuddy an award fer doin' jack-shart.... None've it.

So we had no expectations of praise 'er rewards AN' we all developed far more robust copin' skills with, as yer sayin', the ability ta shrug off minor stuff.... let-go the angry road rage man, the ticked off salesgirl with the attytude, the nasty bus driver that takes off JUST as yer about ta board.... We might say a blue word 'er 2 under our breath but then we move on fast...no boohooin' bout microaggressions, pronouns, perceived "offenses"--cuz puhleese, not gettin' yer arse whooped put stuff in perspective fast....

I'm all fer bein' KIND... ta kids, elders, all that... but when skool teaches ya ta be perpetually resentFULL an' offended WHEN cotton-balled kindness is lackin' then ya know we're in big trouble! Our own kids may have sum "grit" but a lotta kids don't an' it won't serve 'em well methinks... Skools stopped educatin' an' started some kinda psychotherapy infantilizin' an' victiminzin' as "programmin'!" Radical idea... how 'bout books again?! lol

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Tereza Coraggio's avatar

Your last interaction had me tearing up. Good work, Tonika.

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

Thanks, T. Yeah, I’ve been thinking about her all day.

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Thumbnail Green's avatar

That was a great walk through the world of 'normal' so many of us have to deal with through the lens of school. Man we have this relentless First Nations indoctrination going on here. It's totally nonsense.

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Visceral Adventure's avatar

There is no normal, TG. :)

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Thumbnail Green's avatar

Ikr

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